What Happens To The Widowers?

I have just finished bawling my eyes out from watching a movie. I currently have puffy eyes, red nose, and a slight migraine. Yes, today we shall be moving from NollyWood to Bolly Wood. This movie is called Water, written and directed by Deepa Mehta (I am her number one fan). Deepa Mehta is a staunch womanist who uses her movies to remove the covers of pretentiousness and conformance that lies behind the acceptance of certain cultural behaviors as normative. She uses her movies to tell Women's stories and she does it in such a powerful way. Someone, just accused me of intentionally picking movies like this so I can shake my fist at my screen. Na una sabi.!! (lol!)

This movie tells the story of Chiuya, who becomes a widow at eight and has to leave her family to go and live with the other untouchables in the outskirt of the city near the waters. (As a side note: Chiuya is Hindi for the word mouse and that name is definitely a right fit for her because she is as curious as the mouse with her constant questioning of traditions.) The movie is about her adjustment period and how she becomes entwined within the threads of daily living within the commune and how she gets to see the inner workings of religion and women within society. In the process, she makes friends with a young woman, and gets herself embroiled in her love story. This young woman eventually commits suicide because her lover's family were unwilling to accept the impending marriage of their son to an untouchable. This movie has so many themes, it discusses, the acceptance of self denial of women, women being vessels of traditionalism, the cross road of conscience and religion, and the implications of economic dependence on women and most especially religion.

In this movie, we see the cross roads of religion and money - as we see young widows being prostituted to wealthy men in the city and yet these widows are denied their inalienable right to life, liberty and most importantly LOVE. Chiuya, is eventually raped and one of her friend who finds out about the rape smuggles her out of the commune. One of the thoughts that struck me is that often times women are the vessels in which such traditionalism and bondage continues to grow. In this movie, the people who prostitute Chiuya are women, the staunch advocates for the continuance of such systems are women. Since, men are definitely enjoying (free sex), why should they complain?

After crying, it got me thinking about the widows in Nigeria and the rest of Africa, who are living the same story as Chiuya in which their voice is stripped, their rights are thrown away, and they are left to the caprices of in laws who can decide what they want to do or not do with them. In many cases, we hear stories of young widows being thrown out of her husband's house because she has no protection in form of a will. In the rural areas, many of these women, have no means of providing for their families, since some have no skill and they find themselves selling their bodies for money. I am left wondering who is there to tell their stories and fight for them.

I leave you with these questions - what happens to the widower? Why isn't he forced to live in a commune? Why isn't he treated as an untouchable? Why can he continue on with his life as though nothing substantial really happened? How do we go about fighting for the rights of these widows? Why are women often the vessels of the continuance of such societal bondage in Africa (Nigeria numero uno) and India? Could the continuance of this farce in certain countries be tied to the economic
situation in these countries? There was a statement made by one of the characters in the movie and I quote, " often times, religion is all about money"
PS: Ignore typos - I feel really sleepy now.
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