The question of Multicultural dating.

(Before, you start reading: this post is not supposed to generate a regional war, rather it is to understand where certain ideas are coming from. I want to understand).


Anytime, I choose to write on this Multicultural thing - it seems to turn instantly to interracial dating. I am sorry - this time, we shall not digress. This topic has been touched upon on so many blogs including Solomonysydelles, Ugo and other heavy weight websites like African Loft, let's not forget the magazines as well. But one thing, I have noticed is the tendency to move to white dating black. This time we are going to talk about people dating outside their regions of Africa.

Have you ever considered doing so? Have you ever done it? What attracted you to this person? I was talking to this South African Lady the other day and she said that African men in general are attracted to South African Women rather than Kenyan (East Africa) or Ghanaian (West African) women because of the concept of luxury. The idea that these women are richer, more classy and more dignified. African men, make your case - is she right??


I have to admit that on hearing that I was slightly peeved as my mind instantly catapulted to the list of West and East African doctors, lawyers, IT professionals and the works that exist in the diaspora. My mind also went to the fact that there are more immigrants coming from East and West Africa compared to other regions of Africa and many from these regions come here, get educated in many cases with their Masters and PhD and no, I am not bragging because I am WA, but go to any institution in the USA, UK, Australia, look at those graduating for that year - now count the West Africans and East Africans and then compare. Now many of these graduating 'seniors' start earning well and remain within the middle to upper echelon of society. To further prove this, pick up your yellow pages, start counting doctors and lawyers (just decided to pick these professions) - how many are from West and East Africa? How do they compare to other regions of Africa respectively?
The answer is that they compare quite favorably. There are more from these regions individually. Now, how much do these people earn on average? (Make I help una here, we are talking six figures). Yes, all this mathematics was my response to the richer, dignified and classier ideology. I think a lot of people in the bid to seem so important stick to the man who sells bootleg dvd, bags and shoes as being the image of the normal West African. That is quite erroneous. For many West Africans, who start working minimum wage jobs, many are dealing with a lot of responsibilities, including SCHOOL.

Now, I could chalk her comment up as youth and ignorance talking but I realized that if she is right then there seems to be some miseducation going on - so I want to be reeducated by the African Men. Do you consider people like me: highly educated West African women (don't wanna brag but seriously), who are quite goal oriented as being too "Bush" for your taste??

Now Unto Multicultural Dating:

Maybe it is just me having a cold and being groggy this night but I get peeved when people talk about multicultural dating across regions as being the easiest thing to do because seriously it isn't. Personally, I feel it is easier to date outside your race than to date within your race across regions of Africa. Africans tend to be very proud of their culture so who will be giving up what for whom?

Are you ready to accept the fact that your man MIGHT NOT be willing to learn about your culture but he wants you to learn all you can about his? Are you willing to accept the fact that he might want his children brought up ONLY with his culture being the only source of knowledge while yours gets quietly erased? These are questions that people deal with when they date across regions of Africa.

So, I throw the ball back in your courts with these questions:

a) will you date outside your region of Africa?

b) if yes, will you be willing to do the things listed above? If no, how will you handle it if he insists on it?

c) Do you agree with her comment about South, East and West Africans?

d) What is up with non Nigerians saying that Lagos is Beautiful?? The Lagos I remembered was definitely not beautiful, it was fast paced, crazy and you stayed in traffic for two hours, way too many cars etc. So, what is this beauty I jus dey hear about? Maybe na Lekki and V.I these people went to. Or is my memory flawed - will you guys ascribe the word beauty to Lagos.




Ignore the Arabic thing - I don't know what is going on with blogger today'.

Remember, this is supposed to incite a discussion, not a we are better than them kind of argument. I want to know if there are any basis to that thought pattern??


Talib Kweli in Lagos, Nigeria. Thanks solomonsydelles


Have Your Say!!

Happy Monday.